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Friday 15 March 2013
Cynthia Rowley Gets CuRious
Tuesday 12 March 2013
Green for Spring
[Photos Courtesy C. Wonder]
Monday 11 March 2013
Holographic Heels, Anyone?
How I Wore My Heels: With Camo
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Obsessed with MiH
Then look at these jeans!! Selena Gomez was just spotted in the new MiH Bonn jeans ($233) - in the Mini Dot Light wash. Squeal! I'm such a sucker for a polka dot, but a mini dot?? Oh, y'all, it's gotta be the new polka dot. I do assure you, it's much easier to wear as well. This MiH is a new style this season - it has a high rise (thank you) and a super-slim ankle (thank you again). I mean, all I really want in life is to live in a higher rise jean with super skinny ankles for my ankle boots and sneaker wedges...MiH has answered my daydreams. Extra-soft and extra-stretchy are bonus points. See why I'm in love? Gotta get.
[Photos Courtesy MiH]
Sunday 10 March 2013
Stuart Weitzman Does Black and White - Just Right
Saturday 9 March 2013
Whiny Wednesday: Me in a Tree
[Photos via Me in a Tree]
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Sunday 3 March 2013
James Brown's "Living In America"/Weird Al's "Living With A Hernia"
Released in 1986, "Living In America" became Brown's first Top 40 hit in a decade, and as of this writing, his last (sure, he's dead, but come on, that never stopped 2Pac). However, I'm wondering just how glad Brown was to have been living in America just a couple of years later, when he was arrested for drugs and weapons charges, then led police on a high-speed car chase, and was ultimately sentenced to six years in prison (of which he served three). I suppose one could say that James Brown "served for his country."
But before all that image-burnishing, there was Rocky IV. I'm not sure if "Living In America" was written specifically for Rocky IV, but it might as well have been.
I remember my roommates in college catching Rocky IV on TV and laughing copiously; I wandered in and out of the room, and did not feel like I was missing a cinematic treasure. I just read the plot summary on Wikipedia. Let me get this straight: over-the-hill Apollo Creed challenges a young and studly Soviet boxer who's pumped up on steroids to a fight, Apollo dies in the ring, Rocky avenges Apollo's death by training in the Russian mountains with an axe and a sled, he beats the chemically enhanced Soviet boxer using nothing but his hard work and determination, and then he gives a big speech about the Cold War? Hmmmm. I seem to recall the first Rocky being at least somewhat plausible. I mean, why not have Luke Skywalker swoop down and blow up the Death Star while we're at it? And have hobbits and oompa-loompas help Rocky train?
Ah, but thanks to Weird Al, whenever I hear "Living In America," I never think of Rocky Balboa saving the free world from communism. Oh no. I always think of a man with a very painful medical condition.
"Living With A Hernia" became the lead-off track to Polka Party, which, according to Wikipedia, "holds the dubious honor of being the lowest charting studio album released by Yankovic." I'm not sure how Weird Al managed to receive parody permission from a man with such a bad attitude, but props to the Hardest Working Man in Showbusiness for being willing to go along with jokes about intestines. It also probably helped that at the time, James Brown and Weird Al shared record labels.
The song quickly becomes a contest to see how many words Weird Al can come up with that end in "-ation." We've got: "aggravation," "ruination," "location," "humiliation," "irritation," "medication." I'll bet if the situation called for it, he could've come up with more. There's also a highly educational section where he names several different types of hernias, in lieu of Brown's naming several different American cities. I mean hell, I already know the names of American cities.
Joan Jett Suspiciously Claims To Love Rock 'N' Roll
That's why I always thought Joan Jett's "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" was kind of silly. I mean, if you really loved rock and roll that much, you wouldn't need to tell me; it would already be understood. In fact, the more you tell me how much you love rock and roll, the more I'm inclined to doubt that you really do. Me thinks the Joan doth protest too much.
I also thought it was silly how she brags about some attractive young man "moving on and he was with me - yeah me." I mean, he wasn't moving along with me, was he? No, he was moving along with you. Why should I care about your flirting success and not mine?
However, it turns out that Joan Jett didn't actually write "I Love Rock 'n' Roll" (it was written in the mid-70s by an obscure British band named the Arrows), which makes the declaration a little less self-serving. Instead of "Hey, look at me, I'm trying to create a rock anthem," it's more like, "Hey, I found this song that somebody else wrote in the '70s that I really dig, so I'm going to use it to rock out." Having discovered that piece of information, and also appreciating all manner of '80s music anew, I have to say that I now like this song and agree with those who are inclined to share their supposed affection for rock and roll.
If pressed, I have to admit that the song does, indeed, rock. The guitars crunch. The drums pump. The vocals shred. It's not false advertising. On the other hand, certain mustachioed tunesmiths may have agreed with my original view that such blatantly anthemic statements are ripe for ridicule.
Saturday 2 March 2013
John Belushi Lectures The Go-Go's About Using Coke ... And Then Offers Them Coke
Before leaving L.A., some of us had started to get into cocaine, though none more than me. I finally had enough money coming in to afford such an occasional indulgence. The funny thing was, I only knew one person who dealt it - a guy in a photo lab on Santa Monica Boulevard. I had to have him FedEx it to me in New York.Ah yes, here comes the coke. But if Belinda thought she already knew how to do the dust, she had another thing coming. Time to meet a true master:
One day I got a package with half a gram in it and later that night I went with Kathy to the Mudd Club, where we were having a good time when John Belushi sidled up alongside us. John was one of my favorite comedians, and he was an equally big fan of the Go-Go's. He had seen us play the previous December at the Whiskey and partied with us a bit backstage afterward. After Kathy and I traded hellos with him and explained why we were in New York, I asked him if he wanted a hit of my coke.Uh ... wait a minute. What about that whole ... lecture?Because of his reaction, I almost felt like I had insulted him. First his eyes widened, then he pulled Kathy and me close so we could hear him better, and then he proceeded to give us a stern lecture on the evils of drug use, fame, and the sycophant-filled world of show business. I was shocked. I felt kind of embarrassed and stupid for having offered him coke.
A week later, the phone in my hotel room rang at one in the morning. It was John. He said he was in the lobby and asked if he could come up. I said, "Sure, we're up." A moment later, I let him in and then stood back, shocked, as he blew past me like a blast of wind and circled the room. He was wild-eyed and obviously wired. He took a huge vial of coke out of his pocket, dumped it on his hand, and looked at me and Kathy and the other girls with the face of a toxic teddy bear.
"Do you want some?" he asked.
Turns out Belinda hadn't been stupid for offering John Belushi coke. She'd been stupid for taking anything John Belushi said seriously.
Friday 1 March 2013
Madness' "Only" Hit AKA That Song About A House
When friends in college used to play "Our House" on the stereo, they would get this look on their faces which seemed to suggest thoughts such as "Who sings about their house? What a silly topic for a song!" But instead of this being an amusing insight, this was only an unintentional comment on the sad state of American pop music, where 95% of radio hits are generic love songs. When confronted with music that is not about a boy/girl relationship, the typical American listener does not know how to respond. He or she experiences discomfort and embarrassment, and covers up these feelings with defensive humor. The question, my friends, isn't "Who sings about their house?," but rather, "Why doesn't everybody sing about their house?"
I'm not surprised Madness didn't have many American hits; they were more British than the Queen's armpit hair. I am somewhat surprised, however, that their one big American hit happened to be "Our House." I mean, why "Our House"?
In one sense, it's simply another strong Madness single in a long line of strong Madness singles. It may not be their best song, but it is probably in the running. Is it slightly less "British" than their other singles? Did the presence of a string section make the song seem more "pop"?
On the other hand, "Our House" is arguably the kind of song that Madness had been working toward its whole career. Its sentiment is universal, its sound is stately and sweeping. There's nary a hint of ska to be found. Although it was not their biggest British hit, my guess is that even in the UK, it is probably their most well-known song.
I think the answer is that, while "Our House" is somewhat odd and kooky by typical American radio standards, it is less odd and kooky than songs about baggy trousers and joke shops. In other words, by Madness standards, "Our House" is relatively normal. It is just the right amount of odd: odd enough to be memorable, but not so odd that it simply bounces right off you.
Likewise, the video doesn't strike me as being one of Madness' strongest or poorest; if anything, the clip's goofy tone doesn't really do justice to the poignant, nostalgic flavor of the lyrics:
Father wears his Sunday best
Mother's tired, she needs a rest
The kids are playing up downstairs
Sister's sighing in her sleep
Brother's got a date to keep
He can't hang aroundOur house, in the middle of our street
Our house, in the middle of our streetI remember way back then when everything was true and when
We would have such a very good time, such a fine time
Such a happy time
And I remember how we'd play, simply waste the day away
Then we'd say nothing would come between us, two dreamers
Wait, so if "way back then" was "such a happy time," then what does that say about the present? Does the present really stink? And who are the "two dreamers," and did something eventually come between them? These lines suggest that "Our House" is actually not a silly song about people's houses, but an elegy for lost youth and innocence.
You see, Madness songs are not mindless little ditties; they are three-minute works of literature. Madness singles are like mini-plays. Being fully aware of this, I was not surprised to learn about the existence of a Madness jukebox musical, which is called - surprise - Our House. Here's an excerpt of the plot summary:
Our House is the story of Joe Casey who, on the night of his sixteenth birthday, takes Sarah, the girl of his dreams, out on their first date. In an effort to impress her with bravado, he breaks into a building site overlooking his home on Casey Street, which is owned by Mister Pressman, a high-end property developer. The police turn up, at which point Joe’s life splits into two: the Good Joe, who stays to help, and Bad Joe, who flees.I can already see the choice of numbers: "House of Fun," then "Driving In My Car," followed by "Embarrassment," then "Shut Up" - why, a Madness musical writes itself! Somehow or other the plot revolves around Joe's mother trying to keep a developer from destroying the cherished family ... you guessed it.Good Joe, having stayed to help Sarah, is sent to a ‘correctional facility’ for two years. On his release, finding that his past prevents him from getting a good job, he struggles to make ends meet. Despite managing to buy himself a second-hand car, he convinces himself that he is an embarrassment to all who care about him – especially Sarah, whose new college lifestyle reading law is complicated by Callum, a fellow student. In an effort to keep up with this guy, Good Joe is beguiled by his ‘mate’ Reecey into helping stage a break-in for some easy money – is caught and this time sent down.
I think there's another reason why Madness are mainly known in the U.S. for "Our House": it was probably their last truly great single. Americans caught Madness Fever at precisely the wrong time. Sure, the group stuck around for a few more years, but the spirit faltered. The production grew dated, the lyrics became more generic - go and listen if you want. In that sense, "Our House" wasn't just an elegy for lost youth, but also for the band's artistic peak. I think if Madness had been able to follow up "Our House" with, say, "Night Boat To Cairo" or "Cardiac Arrest," they might have made a bigger splash over here. But instead, they had to sit back and let their earlier catalog spread the legacy. For those who bothered to find it.
Margot Olaverra and Kathy Valentine: The Pete Best And Ringo Starr Of The Go-Go's
She was still a committed punk and felt that we were selling out with pop-sounding music. She was against anything that sounded too polished and commercial. But that was the direction in which we were headed ... She didn't take care of herself and missed rehearsals, and when she was there she was contrary and argumentative.One day, as we struggled with the bridge to a new song, she stopped playing, which brought the song to a halt, and looked at us with a frustration that I found impossible to read. Then it became apparent that she didn't like what we were doing.
"Why can't we play songs like X?" she said.
I felt like she left rehearsals and bitched about us to her friends, like Exene Cervenka of X, who seemed to turn against us, especially me. I already felt like Exene thought I was a stupid, silly girl anyway.
In December, Margot was diagnosed with hepatitis A. It was another sign that she wasn't taking care of herself. We had to go to a clinic and get hepatitis shots, which put me in a foul mood. But we turned the situation into an opportunity to make a lineup change before the very important Whiskey gigs.
Kathy had been playing professionally since her teens in Austin, Texas. At sixteen, she had moved to London, and then three years later she'd come to L.A. and co-founded the Textones. She knew one of our roadies and immediately fit right in ... Onstage, she played as if she had been doing it for years. I looked at her at one point and thought, "We have to keep her."Let's see...Kathy could play better, she wrote her own songs, she didn't care about militant punk ethos ... can you say "no brainer"?
But alas, Margot couldn't read the writing on the wall. Like the Beatles before them, the Go-Go's passed the painful duty on to their manager:
In January, Ginger was charged with the messy job of firing Margot. She was told that since she was the manager she had to do it. It was a chickenhearted move on our part, but none of us could handle the dirty work.Yeah, but it was the manager's misfortune to have to sit there and tell her it was the band's decision! At any rate, you can't make an omelette without breaking a few eggs, and with the addition of their spunky new bass player, the Go-Go Alliance was finally complete: "With Kathy on board, we were a unified group. We eliminated the tension and added a talented new songwriter all in the same move."Margot responded as expected. She protested, cried, begged, and denied any of the problems we raised really existed. Ginger kept responding, "It was the band's decision."
Even though they'd just kicked out their most hardcore punk member, the Go-Go's didn't entirely abandon their gritty side. Belinda moved into an apartment that had become infamously known in the L.A. punk scene as Disgraceland:
Clothes were piled high as people, food had been left on every possible surface, the walls were filled with random scribbles and band posters, and it was as dirty as you would expect from a party pad that had the same hours as a 7-Eleven. It never closed.Belinda!I built a small altar in my room at Disgraceland. Even though Pleasant and I had serious boyfriends, we would cast spells on boys we liked. We would put a small amount of our period blood in a vial and surreptitiously drop it into the drink of whichever unsuspecting boys we were crushing on that night. It was something we had read in a book, and every time we did it, I laughed hysterically, thinking, If only they knew.
Bad Belinda! Bad!